Unstructured

There are many things in this life that do not make sense. For the most part, I’ve stopped asking the “why do things like this happen?” question or the “who could ever do something like that?” question because the truth is I could weave my way through a philosophical and theological answer that suffices for most days.

But then there are the days like today…when I’m left staring into the eyes of a broken child; and no polished answer will do for the “why do bad things happen to good people” question.

A Large Debt to Pay

Friday had finally showed up! It had been an eventful week at work as my agency toiled to keep up with the influx of referrals that have been received over the past month. There are so many children and families who need help.

Needless to say the just-around-the-corner weekend was a welcomed sight. But Friday had to be survived first, and I knew it would take some extra effort to push through the 10 hours ahead. Armed with Starbucks and an extra on-call phone, I jumped into my tightly scheduled day; having no idea that today I would meet Rosa.

Loss

Recently my family shrunk. Unexpectedly. Tragically. Permanently.  This isn’t my first run in with death, I’ve seen it before and I’ve seen its greed applied to those who are 20 years old and to those almost 100 years old alike. This time, the departed was somewhere in the middle.

Every time I’m here, reminds me of all the other times I’ve been here.

In the works…

I have been ruminating on something for the past few weeks. Most people who know me even on a casual level know that this pensive act is not new for me. Often an idea or a concept will burrow its way into my psyche where it can remain for days, weeks or even months. I wrestle with it, I ignore it; I sleep on it.

So here I am again. Only I’m a bit more lost than usual.

Parts and Pieces

March in the Rocky’s is perpetually inconsistent. Last weekend, clad in t-shirt and sunglasses, I spent a day biking through enchanting corners of the city, stopping for a bit of ice cream as the temperature-perfect sun draped over the afternoon. Today, roads are closed and the inches of snow continue to stack higher and higher as the hours pass. Although often a cause of frustration, the ever-changing weather of spring in the mountains has recently become, for me, an embodied symbol of the segments of my life.

Life emphatically has its phases. It has to; phases that mirror the undulating quality of the human character.

Out on a limb…

Much of the writing that I do for my own personal processing is not in the form of prose. I have never considered my self a poet (I wish you could see the look on my face as I typed that word…) but often I find that emotion-filled, written expression does not, at least for me, come out in the form of complete sentences and neat paragraphs.

This makes me tremendously nervous to share this with you as it is immensely personal.

Hello 2013

I know most of us have our own ways of recognizing the New Year. To be honest, for whatever reason, this holiday never really bore much personal significance for me, and I don’t know why. I don’t think that I have ever made a New Year’s resolution and I certainly don’t know any of the words to Auld Lang Syne (or even what auld lang syne means in the first place).

But 2012 was big, big for me personally and big for several others who are close to me.